It was a grand spectacle. It could have been staged by a Hollywood producer. The helicopter landed on the lawn near the majestic staircase, the COVID patient emerged dressed elegantly in a suit and tie, he ascended the staircase in the fashion of dictators and strong men everywhere, and like dictators and strong men everywhere, he posed on the balcony facing his adoring public. After defiantly removing his mask and stuffing it into his pocket, he stood at attention for several minutes, basking in the light of the cameras. There were no smiles, no warmth, no friendly gestures, just a posture of strength: his COVID victory lap.
Then he turned to enter his temporary home–also a work place to hundreds of people–unmasked though still contagious and having been visibly laboring to breathe during the entire photo op. But that’s not all. According to reporters, he required videographers to re-shoot the scene of his entering the White House, to be sure they captured just the image he sought to project. All of this time, he was unmasked, in close proximity to those required to assist him and carry out his wishes; but apparently those lives don’t matter. Neither do the lives of the Secret Service agents required to take him on a Sunday afternoon joy ride in a hermetically sealed vehicle.
Hours before leaving the hospital, he wrote these reassuring words: “Don’t be afraid of COVID. Don’t let it dominate your life.”
You heard the man.
Child, don’t be afraid of COVID. The parent whom you loved is gone. You will never again feel the warmth of those loving arms or see the smile on the face you cherished. Your parent will not be present for any of the milestones in your life: at graduations, you’ll see an empty spot in the audience; at your wedding, there will be no celebratory dance with that parent; at every holiday gathering, you’ll see an empty chair where your beloved parent would have sat. You may be forced to live with reduced income, maybe even in poverty, because that parent was a family wage earner. You’ll relive the loss for as long as you live, but don’t let this dominate your life.
Parent, don’t be afraid of COVID. You’ve laid your precious child to rest: the one you brought into the world, maybe nursed at your own breast, tenderly cared for and provided for, and watched in wonder and amazement as they grew. At every new stage of life, the love you thought couldn’t possibly be any greater became even more intense. You fiercely protected your child from every harm, cared for them during sickness, bandaged the wounds of childhood accidents; and then one day, your child encountered an adversary against which you and your doctors were helpless. All you could do is let the disease ravage their body until there was no breath left in it. But you know, hardly any children get COVID; they’re almost immune to it. Your child’s disease was just a fluke, bad luck. So don’t let this dominate your life.
Spouse, don’t be afraid of COVID. The person you loved died alone, with only a FaceTime or Zoom farewell, with no loving touch or comforting presence. But hey, thank goodness for technology, right? Imagine how bad it would have been before we had smart phones and computers. This person to whom you pledged your love and fidelity, with whom you were traveling through life with all of its joys and sorrows, for whom you’d have stepped in front of a bullet, is gone. Never again will you feel the warmth of their body or see the adoration in their eyes as they look deeply into yours; never again will you feel the safety and reassurance you found with them at your side. Your financial circumstances may be reduced without their income, and you may have to raise alone the children you brought into the world together. That gaping hole in the middle of your chest will never completely close over, but don’t let this dominate your life.
Friend, don’t be afraid of COVID. That person you shared life with, laughed with, cried with, danced with, got into mischief with is gone. They died alone, without you or their family members physically present to give comfort and a farewell kiss. The empty chair, the ghostly vision, the heartful of memories, the boxes full of photos are all you have left to remind you of the special love you shared. Your friend may be one of the tens of thousands who didn’t have to die, who would still be alive had there been competent national leadership to get this virus under control as all other nations have done. But it is what it is, so don’t let this dominate your life.
Uninsured and underinsured Americans, don’t be afraid of COVID. If you test positive, no helicopter will land on your lawn and whisk you off to the world’s premier medical facility. You won’t be looked after by a dedicated team of doctors, you won’t be given expensive cutting-edge treatments, you won’t have a private suite of rooms. In fact, you’ll be lucky to get any treatment at all, because the person gloating in front of the cameras about having conquered his own illness, through expensive cutting-edge treatments which you and I paid for, has consistently attempted to strip you of the insurance which might have provided you a basic level of treatment and has lawyers in court now arguing to leave millions of you without any insurance. But don’t worry; he’s fine. He beat it, thanks to you and me. So don’t let this dominate your life.
Business owners, don’t be afraid of COVID. Your business may have gone under because of the shutdowns and the economic downturn caused by the pandemic, or maybe you’re struggling to hold onto the last shreds of what was your livelihood. You’ve had to watch your employees apply for unemployment because you can no longer write the checks by which they have provided for themselves and their families. But you’ll find something else, and so will your employees. Just get out there and live the American dream. If you work hard enough, you will prosper. Times have been tough, and they’re going to be tough awhile longer, but don’t let this dominate your life.
Unemployed workers, don’t be afraid of COVID. You’ve lost your job because of a pandemic and the reckless, irresponsible handling of it, but thank goodness for unemployment checks, eh? And how about that one stimulus check you received? You remember, the one that came months ago, with the “president’s” signature. You can’t pay your rent or mortgage payment, you worry every day about how you’ll feed your family, you struggle to make the car payment and buy insurance and fuel for the vehicle. But be creative, man! Consider this time a gift: learn a new skill, take a trip, write a book. Whatever you do, don’t let this dominate your life.
Essential workers, don’t be afraid of COVID. You’ve been out there every day since the beginning, ringing up sales at grocery stores, home improvement stores, banks, and gas stations. You’ve been verbally and physically assaulted by frustrated, angry customers who don’t want to wear masks or who can’t understand why they are limited to purchasing only one package of toilet paper. You’ve gone home every day with the knowledge that you may have been exposed to the deadly virus and if so are exposing your family to it as well. But be grateful you have a job, and don’t let this dominate your life.
Exhausted health care workers, don’t be afraid of COVID. You’ve been the ones in direct contact with the more than 7 million Americans who have contracted the virus, and you’ve witnessed the deaths of the more than 211,000 Americans who were not so lucky as our “president.” You’ve worked extra shifts, often without proper equipment because our national leadership did not use all of the available resources to produce sufficient PPE for both you and your patients or the extra respirators and other equipment you needed to provide the level of care your patients required. You go home every day bone weary, praying you’ve protected yourself well enough to avoid infection and praying you’re not taking home anything that might endanger your family. You struggle to suppress the scenes of trauma dancing in your brain so that you can go to sleep and be renewed for another day of the same–with no foreseeable end. You push aside dark thoughts of ending your own life, as others in your field have done, because the stress and the pain have become unendurable. But hey, don’t let this dominate your life.
Precious wife, whose husband died of cancer in March, don’t be afraid of COVID. Your husband didn’t have COVID, but the skilled care facility where he was being treated had to be locked down because of the pandemic, so he died alone. In his mental confusion, caused by dementia and the drugs he was receiving, he thought you had abandoned him. You who were married to him for over 50 years, you who walked beside him, you who worked with him during the years you both served marginalized people and anyone else who needed your help, you who loved and cared for him throughout his life and during his illness. In the end, you had to say goodbye on the phone, with him not understanding that you were still there and still loved him.
Dear cousins, who were unable to visit your mother, my aunt, during the last few months of her life, don’t be afraid of COVID. Your mother was one of the most loving and giving people I’ve ever known. Her home was always open to family, and her nieces and nephews knew we could count on her to show us a fun time. She, of the twelve siblings, was the one who stayed close by and cared for our grandmother during her final years. She was a leader in her community, taking the initiative to found a library when she learned that the small town you moved to didn’t have one. She didn’t have COVID, but she too was in a care facility that had to be closed to visitors because of the pandemic. So after almost 90 years of living for others, she died alone.
I wonder how all of you felt when you saw the man on the balcony say, “I’m fine. Maybe I’m immune? So get out there. Don’t be afraid.” Did you feel that this man cared about your loved one? Did you feel that he cares about you? Did you feel that this man deserves to live in the People’s House another four years while you and I pay his bills so that he can go on not giving a damn what happens to any of us?
Francine Prose, in a Guardian article, says what many of us have felt and thought:
“We’d like to believe that suffering instructs and ennobles; that our grief, fear and pain increases our sympathy for the grief, fear and pain of others. But again, Donald Trump seems to be ineducable, impervious to shame, guilt, or any sense of personal responsibility, unaffected by anything except vanity, selfishness and reckless self-regard. Certainly, the experience of having his blood oxygen level drop so low that supplemental oxygen was required must have been alarming, and yet the president continues to believe that bluster is the best medicine.”
Our nation is on code blue. It’s our choice whether we pull the plug on our democracy or wake up and work like hell to resuscitate it. We can’t allow these 211,000 lives to be lost in vain. Starting now, we have to elect responsible leaders, and then we have to be responsible leaders and followers. Our lives and our children’s and grandchildren’s lives depend on what we do in the next 28 days and beyond. Voting is only the beginning. Our new president (please, God!) is going to need our cooperation and support. It’s up to us to put the “United” back in “United States of America.”